A few days back, I finally planted the end of a bag of summer bulbs. The first of the bag are already up, but most of the last bit were at least sprouted, so I hope they'll bloom eventually, even if it's later than the rest. Bob changed the water in his fishtank today, and agreed to give them a bucket of aquarium water, which might help them along. We've had a few warm days, so I thought they might be needing a bit of extra love.
Planting bulbs gives me hope for the future. When I read the newspaper as I eat breakfast, it can be easy to focus on what's going wrong -- the wrong-headed politics, terrorists killing themselves in an effort to kill others, dictators grabbing ever more power over their people. But I plant bulbs, work in free and open software, work with students, work on documentation for people whom I will never know, because I do have faith that if we work together, think together, we can make a better future.
When I think back over my life, I sometimes wish I'd made some better choices, and been kinder to others along the way. Still, my mistakes hopefully have taught me some lessons, and my guilt over my sharp tongue or the times I should have stood up for someone and kept silent; those help me now moderate my tone, remain helpful even to resentful people, and speak up when I'm afraid, for those who are perhaps frozen in terror.
In my daily life, I try to leave everything I touch in a beautiful or at least orderly state, both for my later delight, or for others. I'm not a powerful person, but I try to use the power and privilege I do have as a relatively wealthy white straight married retired American to make the world a better place for every person on earth. Don't give up hope when the news is bad. Plant some bulbs.
The pendulum swings both ways; fear and selfishness will eventually change to hope and generosity.
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